When I was at art school people commented on writing I shared and said ‘Kat that’s what you’re good at I love your writing’ and so a sense built that maybe I could be good with words. But what did that mean, how might that look and what to do with it? I should have got them to fill a questionnaire out at the time and asked them for specifics.
I am studying again now and writing in an academic style which is what is required. My peers now tell me they like my journals.
I am struggling to write clearly and express my self. I can express my feelings in word pictures but stitching together the whole and making sense of stuff is so painful and I wonder if the un comprehension of this is purely and simply related to my life. Maybe that is a too big a question.
A tutor spoke and drew a solution for me last time up at Whitecliff and hurrah I understood it. I got a course manual at the beginning of the year and it looked like Chinese graphics. I have become increasingly right brained in the last few years, I can’t spell any more and I continually think in metaphor, which makes it complicated to be clear on paper.
So I am practicing and doing my best and trying not to panic when I don’t know stuff. It feels as dramatic at times as walking on a tightrope over a live volcano.
Zach gave some good advice of doing little bits at a time and concentrating for small periods, which has helped engage my brain a bit better.
These thoughts about writing, expression and ways of learning have occupied my brain for the whole of the year. Thankfully towards the end of the last paper (which was a research one-(no practical component) my brain clicked in and I was able to slightly figure what was required. All the way through I thought this is life really when you chose to engage in new challenges and take on different things. There is of course the choice to stay put and build a build wall around what you know and hang on…that sounds harder to me and very unappealing.
I had a party on Saturday and It felt very Narnian. Nearly five years of walking through talking forests, battling many strange creatures and making unexpected friends in unexpected places. A door has opened to a new world and I am standing in the frame.
And for interest a blog I subscribe to, lots of good posts this one resonated with me this morning.